So, I'm going to assume that the title alone will be fair warning to those who read this post. I won't go into ridiculous details, but I find that this is a subject that a lot of moms and dads talk about. So be warned. This is about potty training, but there's nothing particularly disgusting in the topic itself. It's not a "how to" manual, just my experiences in the past ten years of this fascinating and extremely difficult milestone in my kid's lives.
Today we had a massive success.
Grady pooped in the potty!
All by himself.
YES! YES YES YES YES YES YES YES!!!
As soon as we have babies, we have to be aware of the contents of our children's diapers. Color, texture, frequency, we need to be able to answer those questions when we see the doctors and nurses. We become obsessed with the topic and this doesn't end until our kids are potty trained. Being that I have a bit of an impulse control issue, sometimes I found myself discussing this topic in the wrong time and wrong situation when I first became a parent. I had to learn early on that there is a time and a place to discuss pee and poop. However, over time, it becomes less and less important, until the child turns around 18 months to three years of age. Then the topic of potty training comes up.
Now, to understand how monumental this is for me, you have to remember that my three year old is a stubborn, hard headed, highly intelligent and insane little man. It makes for a difficult combination when trying to even do the most simple of tasks.
And potty training is NOT one of those simple tasks.
It's a head splitting, frustrating, disgusting, terrifying and yet highly amusing exercise in parenting.
Potty training requires massive patience, consistency and follow through. ( I, as I have mentioned in the past, experience great difficulty in consistency and follow through.) You need to be willing to crack down occasionally on the kid in question, making sure he/she understands that there is a reason for this, it's part of life and everyone does this.
Some kids take to potty training like it's just the simplest thing to do.
Some kids, like my wonderful three year old, fight it until all you want to do is plug the kid up and hope that he doesn't explode.
When Logan potty trained, he did it right after we brought his sister home from the hospital. He just decided one day to do and VOILA it was done. During the day. Nighttime was a lot harder to deal with. Monthly I had to go to Walmart or Superstore to purchase 27 nighttime diapers for 20 bucks a pop. Sometimes, I could get a really good deal and pick up double that for about two dollars more, but it was always a pain in the ass. Jeff and I weren't sure why he wasn't figuring out the whole nighttime thing, but one day Jeff decided enough was enough and took away the nighttime diapers. Within a week, he was accident free. It was strictly a safety thing and he didn't feel like he was ready. Well...daddy fixed that.
Olivia was far easier. Same thing to start though. We brought a new baby home and that was that. She wanted to potty train. Okay...no problem. While Logan was 7 before he stopped with the nighttime diapers, Olivia was 5. She said to me one night she didn't want to wear the diaper anymore and that was it. I warned her of accidents, because Logan had taken so long, but she was confident. Accident free within a short period of time.
Olivia and Logan liked to do what we called "potty touring". This meant when we went out, they had to try out each and every bathroom in the building. Sometimes, more than once. When a kid is potty training and says "I need to pee!" There's not a chance in hell that a parent is going to say to their three year old "Oh no honey. You can hold it!" Many times, moms and dads will abandon their carts in grocery stores, gripping the hand of the small child in question, rushing to the potty. If you're lucky enough to hear a mom or dad in the bathroom, you'll hear them in the stall with their child, urging them to pee and the child happily chattering away about how awesome it is to use a public bathroom. It's always highly amusing to me to hear that. For some reason, this is a huge deal for some kids. My older two were those kids. We called it "potty touring" because there were many times we'd go to a public washroom, only to have the kid sitting on the toilet unable to pee because they'd just peed five minutes before on another toilet in the same building. It can be so frustrating, but you never say to no a kid when they need to pee...even if you think you know better. It only takes that ONE TIME where you say "no, you just went" that within five minutes, the kid is now waddling around Walmart with that same parent gripping their child's hand, looking for cheap pants and a pair of underwear to buy and get changed into.
Grady. Oh...sweet Grady. He hates the public bathrooms. He hates the loud toilets, the hand driers, the whole experience. I've had him hold it from 9 am until 8:30 pm that night because he would have had to use a public bathroom at some point. But then at home, I've had him in his underwear, near to his dear Thomas the Tank Engine toilet seat, and changed him five times that day due to accidents. He's always baffled me.
Our biggest challenge? Oh...the blessed number two. The Holy Grail of potty training. Some kids are amazing and pick it up at the same time as peeing in the potty. Others, like Grady, like to make damn sure that while you think you know what you're doing, you don't even have the slightest clue. Given Grady's personality and the fact that we weren't having any other babies after him, I knew we were going to be challenged.
For some strange reason, I kept all of Logan's old underwear from when he was Grady's age. I don't know if this is a normal thing, to pass them on, but they were cleaned and sanitary. I knew this would benefit us, because as most parents know, for some reason, those small scraps of fabric, with super heroes, ponies and the days of the week on them, are ridiculously expensive. Whenever a number two happens, I just throw them out. I don't want to wash that crap. Literally. So, in keeping Logan's old stuff, we managed to save ourselves several dollars in tossed out underwear. This is not a practice I intend on maintaining in the future. For this age, it's perfectly fine, in my opinion.
Anyway, Grady refused to do the number two in the potty. It was getting extremely frustrating. We finally go it through to him that it's "okay" to do it in his diaper. It's a lot easier to clean up. We'd speculate as to "why" he wasn't doing it. Was it a power trip? Was he afraid to "flush part of himself"? Ever tried to dissect the psyche of a three year old? Don't. You'll just wind up questioning your own sanity.
However, in order to get the point through to him that we don't want him doing it in his pants and underwear, we used the shower. Not a cold shower. A warm shower. He doesn't like showers. Never has. I don't like the idea of using it for negative reinforcement, but for some reason, my boys are some of the hardest learners I've ever met. It has to be harsh to be effective and it drives me nuts and kills me. I'm not a fan of it. Thankfully, we only had to do it three times before he got it. And really, it wasn't the shower that he didn't like. It was the hair washing that he hated the most. He hates that whether he's in the bath or in the shower. He's always hated getting his hair washed. I picture white blonde dreadlocks and flies in our future.
In case you're wondering, we had positive reinforcement as well. Each time (for the first week or two) that he peed in the potty, he got what we called a "potty pop". A lolly pop can go a long way to encourage peeing in the potty, when it comes to Grady. As he became more successful at the process, we would praise him and only give him a "potty pop" if he asks for one. Today, when he did his number two, I literally cheered with him. This was the proudest little three year old that ever existed. Then we had to call Daddy and tell him that this happened. I mean, this was a party. He got not one, but TWO chocolate chip cookies. Whenever I ask him "What did you do in the potty today?" He gets this huge grin on his face and says "Pooped!"
I know it's a strange topic to discuss in my blog, but it's a big deal. Once Logan turns ten next month, I will have changed BABY DIAPERS (so Huggies, Pampers, etc) every single day for ten years. (Except for when I went to Las Vegas...thanks everyone who had to take over the process then!) TEN YEARS! I'm done. I'm so ready for this milestone to be done. I don't want to watch the kids go to the bathroom anymore. I don't want to be sitting on the edge of the tub, encouraging a toddler to do his/her business on the toilet. I'm done. Ten years is plenty.
Once we're past this milestone, we're pretty much out of the baby/toddler stuff. It's bittersweet, because it means no more babies and such, but it's more sweet than bitter. A person can only look at crap so much before it gets tiresome!
No comments:
Post a Comment