Week Two - How Are You Feeling?

Week two.  How in the world does time go by so fast?!  Everyday seems to just pass by.

How am I feeling?  I have asked myself that a few times.  I've been able to have many moments of quiet self-reflection and I must say, I feel wonderful!  

Besides a nasty cold that I've had for a week, everything is great.

I feel calmer, less likely to get upset, I'm not yelling as much, I'm far more patient and my anxiety is at an all time low.  When someone asks me how I'm feeling, it can be difficult to put it into words, because how I felt before the diagnosis was difficult to put into words.  Most of the time, people saw how I was acting rather than knew how I was feeling.  

The reaction of people when I tell them about the diagnosis is really great.  There are two main reactions.  The first is "Oh!  And how did you come to see your doctor about that?"  My favorite is "Yep."  And while it might not be an actual "Yep", there's little surprise in most people's faces and responses.  However, the best response I'm getting now is understanding. A thought of "Yes!  That's it!" and then they aren't empathetic or sympathetic.  They are understanding.  They aren't condescending or anything.  Just understanding.  It makes much more sense to people.  *I* make more sense to people.  That's a good feeling!

I'm sleeping better.  I'm falling asleep far easier than ever, especially with the melatonin.  And while I do occasionally wake up, mostly due to my congestion, I fall back to sleep easily.  I haven't had any strange dreams, and this is new.  I usually have many weird dreams that leave me feeling groggy and feeling weird during the day.  When I wake up, I'm still groggy when I wake up, just like anyone else, but after I take my medications, drink coffee and get the day started, within about half an hour, I'm awake.  I napped constantly.  I'm not napping really at all.  I took a nap this afternoon, for a bit more rest after a long evening with friends and getting up rather early.  Having a cold doesn't help, and if I hadn't had the cold, chances are I wouldn't have napped.  I felt fairly clear and awake.  

I'm loving the physical activity.  Taking the kids to the park, going to the gym, going for a walk to the mall, these all make me feel great.  I was at the pool for swimming lessons yesterday morning with the kids, and it was really awesome!  Days are just far more fun and easy now.  I don't dread anything, and even though I was ridiculously early yesterday for swimming lessons, I didn't feel any anxiety and little irritation with Grady's behaviour.  

I'm a better parent.  I'm following through better, I'm clearer in my instructions and while the cold keeps me from being totally clear of head, I'm definitely finding things easier with the kids, overall.  Helping Logan with his homework is far easier!  That's been a great part of this.  I can sit down, talk calmly with him and help him through his own frustration and have him settle when he starts to shut down.  

Two weeks.  Two short, fast weeks and things have changed so dramatically.  I'll probably always talk a lot, but I'm talking more slowly, thinking things through.  I'm more capable of listening right now.  

Now.  I need to get past this cold and everything will be wonderful.  

And the weather could boost a bit too.  I'm pretty tired of winter.  This is one very cold spring!